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Making sure collaboration is part of a collaborative divorce

Families and married couples in New Mexico understand that couples and parents need to work together to reach a common goal. A certain skill is often needed to accomplish a healthy and lasting relationship and, in contrast, that same skill is also needed in dissolution. A collaborative divorce seeks to add value while also promote a fair, calm and cost-effective divorce. The key is cooperation and, if the divorcing couple can work as a team, they could benefit from collaboration or mediation.

In order to create a successful collaborative divorce approach, the couple must establish a strong team. This means that the couple does not only need to work together but so does their representation. The idea of co-creating the collaboration is key, which is much different than cooperating. Although cooperation is crucial, it is only a component because there is collaboration.

Some couples confuse the purpose of the process, and it does not work in their best interest because they aren't willing to be flexible and accommodating in order to reach current and future goals. This is often because they seek to avoid litigation and the high costs associated with it. This often leads to disputes and unwillingness to budge on issues such as child custody and support.

Although collaboration and mediation are two methods that could significantly help divorcing couples see the bigger picture and create a strong divorce settlement, this process is not for everyone. Some couples do not have the amount of communication, patience and drive that is required by these methods.

No matter what dissolution process a couple decides to go with, it is important that they understand what options could be available to them. Gaining independent advice could help ensure that the interests of everyone involved are served and their rights are protected.

Source: Huffington post, "What Is "Collaborative Divorce" Without Collaboration?" Mark Baer, March 23, 2014

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